Alien Resurrection

Synopsis

A CGI nightmare of human/alien reproduction due to crazy Kevorkian scientist attempting to recreate the Alien Ripley killed in Alien³ for a weapon.

Review

I didn't want to watch this movie based on the plot. I should state that my synopsis, while accurate to the movie is not what I read. This is what I read.

This movie is for sure a mess. The jump forward of 200 years, then somehow they found enough genetic material to clone Ripley and separate it from the Queen. Let alone the sequencing of the alien just doesn't make sense. But let us suspend that disbelief and say they can figure that out. Ok cool. You still have the issue that Ripley isn't Ripley as she is super strong, can smell the aliens, and seems to have a split personality. Plus she has some memories of herself and of the alien, but not all. Just seems super selective. If some memories are part of the recreation, then they all should be.

I mentioned the CGI and I can tell you that they use a crap ton of 70s CGI and repeat scenes with the aliens up close to the camera to reduce the practical builds. They also just used flashing scenes to repeat the same sequence over and over. It was dumb.

Speaking of dumb things, the plot holes that are covered with one line. The other humans with super human capabilities, I'm talking about you dude with guns on his hands that can do the math to bounce a bullet for a headshot. Cool camera thought, but stupid. I know followers of the movies will think "He is the android," he isn't. Its someone else that gets everything based on their one line plot whole filler.

My Rating

I completely understand why people typically won't count this as canon or even like it. It is a terrible movie when you add it to the others. It is also just displays a lack of capability by the Director, Jean-Pierre Jeunet, who should never have been allowed to do this film based on his history as a director. I want to blame the writers as well since this is their story, but I am not sure how much of it is a required writers credit or if they actually wrote it. If they did, they should just punch themselves once in the face for this catastrophe. This is at best a 3. The entertainment was low, the CGI was ridiculous, and the dialogue was lazy.

Parental Rating

Nudity in the clones. Language and gushes of blood that had no real place other than because. The story doesn't have any family value and the action is so poorly choreographed that it just looks phoned in on their best day. Rejected by both without even thinking about it.

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